Excuse generator

What it's for

It's a game, and it should be taken as one: a button that produces a ready-made excuse, of the kind heard in offices and classrooms. It's good for a laugh in a chat, for a gag, for a creative writing exercise, or to break the ice by taking turns telling the most absurd excuse you've actually used.

Why the best excuses are the short ones

There's something the excuses in this list have in common with real ones, and it's what makes them funny: they're short and only partly checkable. Whoever invents too much adds details, and details are exactly what makes an excuse unconvincing, because nobody describes the traffic with the precision of someone making it up. It's the paradox of lying: the more you explain, the less you're believed.

In real life the short truth works better

Said without moralizing: made-up excuses are the road that looks short and turns out long, because they have to be remembered and kept up. «Sorry, I'm running late, I'll be there at eleven» costs ten seconds and leaves nothing to manage afterwards. The excuses on this page are for laughs, and they're funnier if they stay here.

Nearby tools

For an evening with friends there are Truth or dare and Icebreaker questions; to let chance decide for you Pick for me. If instead you really do have to write a message and just need it short, the count is done by Word counter.